The minister said, “The law is shit, and its legislators are under my surmayah [Arabic: shoe].  He gave orders that no one should bother Melnikov during his work.

The director was so happy that Melnikov didn’t inform on him that he chased away all the people in front of the lion cage and said, “Tafaddal va sidi” [Arabic: “Please, sir”],  “the lions and I are your servants.  Just say the word.”

Melnikov said, “Coffee.”

The director brought him coffee and Melnikov started to work.  By the time he started sketching, all the lions had fallen asleep.  He told them to roar, they didn’t roar.  He said to them, “Tzzzz.”  They didn’t bat an eyelash.  He went “Zrrr” and all the donkeys in the area started braying.  But the lions—nothing.  They were finished.  He saw that he had no other choice.  He approached the cage and started to stick his hand in.  One lion saw the hand, got up, and tore Melnikov’s shirt and his chest.  But the lion didn’t roar.  Blood started to flow.  Great God!  Melnikov left the zoo and ran to a pharmacy.

The pharmacist asked him, “What happened?” and poured an ounce of iodine on Melnikov’s chest.

Melnikov didn’t want to involve the zoo director, so he said, “A cat.”

The pharmacist said, “Walla [Arabic: By God!], a big housecat.  A cat like that belongs only to Abu Tintan.”

Melnikov said, “Does he roar?”

The pharmacist said, “What do you mean, roar?  A leopard is a dog compared to him.”